Put down that dumbell!!

I got all of the important questions, and all the BIG concerns answered during my first consultation. Now that the decision was made, and the surgery was scheduled...it was time to go over the "recovery-day to day" stuff.

My latest pre-op appointment went a little something like this:

Doc: do you have any questions or concers?
Me: will I have to stop working out?
Doc: (holding back a "duh" look) yes, for 6 to 8 weeks.
Me: (holding back an "I hate you" look) really?
Doc: yes!
Me: for 6 to 8 weeks....really???
Doc: yes and YES!
Me: Is there anything at all I can do for excercise?
Doc: Yes, I do want you to walk. Walking will be good for you.
Me:(expressing an "I just saw a silver lining" look) oh that's great! how many miles are we talking here?
Doc: (expressing a "concerned" look) miles?? I meant you can walk in your hallway at home.......

Ok fine, I'll say it....what about sex?

One question came to mind....what about sex? Seeing that, after the procedure, I wouldn't be allowed to take part in the wonderful "hormone therapy movement", where would that leave me?  Would I actually want to have sex? and would I even enjoy it after all this?

You might think this is a stupid concern to have,when your life is at stake, but for me....well I chose to wait until I was married, which technically makes me a (she says in a hushed tone) v*i*r*g*i*n. So I wondered if all this meant that I would never experience sex like everybody else. Which would be yet another way that this gene (BLOWS1) makes me different from other people.

According to my doc, sex drive will deffinitely be effected...but seeing as sex for a woman is very emotional....maybe even more so than physical...this particular side effect can vary from woman to woman.

Seeing as I'm "single central" at the moment, I won't have an answer to this any time soon. But no worries, once I know....you'll be the first I tell.

Adoption or bust!

Removing your ovaries and uterus doesn't leave a girl with a lot of options for having babies. It seems like every woman should have a right to do that, shouldn't we? I know that I'm not ready for kids now, but how am I going to feel a few years from now?

Weather I'm ready to make these decisions or not, I had to consider other options. Freezing my eggs came up..but when I discussed it with the doc, she told me about all the hormones they would have to pump into me in order to produce these eggs. And unfortunately I'm kinda pressed for time here. Plus, seeing as hormones actually aid in the development of cancer cells, that would sort of defeat the purpose.

I never considered adoption before all this. You grow up, and you think things are just going to go as the pretty picture you have in your head....Girl meets Boy, Boy plays guitar and drives Camero, Boy and Girl fall in love, Girl makes babies.

My life may not be the pretty picture I imagined, but it's still mine....and it's a good one. If I am meant to be a mom one day, then it will happen. Only God knows, but I have faith.

How BLOWS1 got its name

I will eternally be grateful to my good friend Meghna, who is this amazing super super smart doctor, for giving me new perspective on the BRCA1 and BRCA2 name.    

She picked me up for dinner last week, because my sister had blocked my car into the garage (long story...would take another blog!)  Anyway, we were talking about my current predicament...and she looked at me and said, ever so gently...."This blows!"....."They should just call it BLOWS 1 and BLOWS 2".  

Needless to say, I laughed so hard I almost spit out what I was eating....and the name stuck.
From then on, BRCA1 will always be BLOWS1 to me!...it's a much more fitting name I think. ;)

The big 2012 ovaries debate!

After the phone call, comes the consultation...my sister came to the appointment with me..per my doc's request. I suppose it makes sense that they ask you not to come alone. "All the information can be a little overwhelming"........is what they say.

 

Here are my options:  do I take out only the mass? or do I take out the mass and the one ovary? or do I take out the mass and both ovaries? or do I take out the mass and wait for the results of the report and then take out my ovaries?  or do I bite the bullet and take out the mass, both ovaries and the uterus?   "what about the fallopian tubes?"........what about the fallopian tubes???    so now it's like...do I take out the mass, the ovaries, the uterus and the fallopian tubes?... and how about a kidney or two just encase?!  yep....why would this be   overwhelming....?

 

In the end, given my family history (mom and grandma died from ovarian cancer)...and my genetic disposition (BLOWS1 positive), I felt it would be best to take everything out now, to clean up house, close up shop! I know it will be one less burden I'll have to carry. Of course, it will be replaced by other burdens....but nobody's perfect..right?

 

 

 

Those of you who are done with preventative surgery take a step forward..not so fast Rosie!

Hey there, so I thought my journey with preventative surgery was over....until 2 weeks ago when I got a dreaded call from my gynocologist.

I tested positive for BRCA1 two years ago, and needless to say...my life has been nothing but "important medical decisions" ever since.  Don't get me wrong, I feel blessed to have this knowledge, and be able to make the decisions that could possibly save my life...still, it doesn't make "making" these decisions any easier. It's a huge responsability. I don't think people realize what a huge responsability it is.

I opted to do a preventative mastectomy 2 years ago, with the added bonus of a long and painful recovery....and now the doc tells me they found a mass in my ovaries.   I knew that it was only a matter of time before I was faced with the decision to remove my ovaries and uterus...but are you ever really ready for that phone call?  I think not.